Friday, August 05, 2005
What bothered Fiona the most was that she could never tell anyone how she truly felt about Devin. Her friends never even hinted at Fiona dating Devin, which made it seem that even they didn't see them together. As long as Fiona kept this unspoken love inside of her, she could go on dreaming and hoping that one day Devin would love her as much as she loved him. Her love was tender and fragile, and she couldn't let the outside world nor another one of Devin's girlfriends break it. Safely hidden away, her love didn't seem silly or childish. Even after 6 years of nothing but friendship mixed with hidden innuendos, Fiona's flame was still burning. Oh and how she had tried to put it out! Many times she had doused it with water, but even at its smallest, it still flickered inside of her, never failing to create warmth for her heart.Cafe Intermezzo IV
~*~
All of the other men in her life had captured her eye, but failed to capture her heart. Moreover, they would fall head over heels for Fiona, but she could never quite reciprocate back what they felt for her. It was if all of these relationships were doomed to fail, but that didn't bother Fiona because she didn't even want them to succeed. That is until Max came along.
He had been in one of her International Law classes at Yale, and she had never noticed him until they had been assigned partners for a project on the International Courts pertaining to genocides in Africa.
After class he had walked up to her and introduced himself eloquently, "Hello Fiona, I am Max, and it will be a pleasure working with you. We have many resources at our disposal, including my recent trip to Kenya for primary cultural examples." And away they went discussing Kenya, Kenya's politics, and the current tribal conflicts between the Bantus and Nilotes. They found themselves at a coffee shop later that evening, sipping lattes and debating whether Kenya's President Daniel arap Moi was really a closet Communist.They couldn't get enough of each other, drinking in each other's travel experiences, personal research accumulations, and passions. Everything flowed, and as Max walked Fiona back to her apartment they laughed at each other's broken Swahili.
"Wow, I hardly realized, but it's 2 am."
"At least our project is off to a good start."
They both smiled, amazed at what a good evening they had in each other's company. Closing the door, Fiona wondered when was the last time that she had connected with someone so intimately. "We'll see how far this goes."
~*~
Never had she dreamt that she would be engaged to Max a year later. Max had a way of sweeping her off her feet, and his creative romantic gestures never ceased to impress her. She would never forget how he had bought her a bouquet of her favorite glass flowers. Glass roses, birds of paradises, lilies, and gladioloses, in different vibrant shades and glass mediums all stood majestically by her bedside. After Max's last gift, she knew that it was time to lock up her former love for Devin. She picked a small, comfortable chamber in her heart, and put her love inside. She locked the room and hid the key.
Never had she done anything like this before. She was choosing to take the first step, and write it in stone. She remembered how sad she had been. Max, confused, kept asking her if she was alright, and if he could do anything for her. Appreciatingly she would always reply that he was enough for her, and she didn't need anything else. Their love grew and blossomed. It was different than the love she had experienced for Devin. Her love for Max was momentous and vibrant, always carrying them off to one place or another. They were deeply passionate about each other, but for some reason it lacked a bottomless depth-almost as if she could anticipate when all of this fervor and intensity would turn into the everyday love of two married people having lived for many years together. And she knew that would eventually come along, but she wished that she didn't have to forsee it already.8:50 AM 1 Falling Stars
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